Shadows of the Soul
Part 2
By Kahreen and Flynt
Story #17 in the second season of clan chronicles
Edited by Vashkoda
Illustrations by Kahreen
******
“Ah still don’t see why we couldn’t have stopped for a moment and checked it out,” Cesar grumbled as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. The ship was now well on it’s way back to the cabin. The four males had searched the remains of the Zentech complex with no luck. The only things they had found there were a smoking crater and a lot of black vans, all of which were being loaded by a number of humans. There was no sign of the vampire army that Zentech had once controlled, nor any indication that anything supernatural had occurred there. However there was also no sign of Dog, and although Malachi blew his dog whistle several times, there was no response.
As they had come to the conclusion that Dog wasn’t there and had prepared to move on to Newbridge, Cesar spotted something lurking in the shadows near the ship. The scent had been faint, but it was also unmistakable, and Cesar had argued with the others to no avail. They weren’t here to chase ghosts and shadows, Flynt had argued. They were here to find Malachi’s pet and that was all there was to it.
Reluctantly, Cesar had backed down, silently vowing to go back to the Zentech site and search it when he got the opportunity. He had unfinished business there, and somehow he knew that this unfinished business would be waiting for him.
Their path back to Newbridge followed the same road that the vampire army had forced Malachi and Cairo to march along on their way from the city to the complex. Every now and again, they would land and Malachi would give three sharp blows on the whistle. Although there were several howls in response, none belonged to the small terrier. A mile outside of the city, however, amongst the howls and barking that followed the call, was one that sounded familiar. After Malachi had followed up with a combination of short and long blows, a small white dog burst from some bushes close to the ship.
With Dog finally on board and reunited with his master, the ship had taken off and turned towards home. It was then that Cesar had brought up the subject of the shadow once again, and just as quickly, Flynt shot it down. With the finding of Dog, the tan gargoyle seemed more urgent in his need to return to the cabin. It didn’t escape the notice of the others, although they said nothing about it. In truth - aside from Cesar - they both wanted to return ‘home’ as soon as they could.
And now their goal was in sight, the cabin almost invisible amongst the trees. The clan had made sure that no light escaped from the windows or any smoke from the chimney-nothing that could announce their presence to any prying eyes.
Nothing save the four clan members who stood outside the cabin, their eyes trained on the sky with concerned looks upon their faces.
“Something’s up,” Madbrook noted, leaning over the console and peering out of the windscreen.
Flynt said nothing. His eyes were searching for the one face that should have been out there but wasn’t. Where was she? As the ship landed and he moved toward the exit, the uneasy feeling that had been growing within him for the last two hours was now building to a real fear. Something had happened, and deep within his soul he knew to whom.
“Where is she?” he demanded as he landed on the soft earth and strode towards the small group.
“Flynt,” began Vash as she cast a nervous glance at the others before looking straight at the clan leader. “Kahreen’s in the cabin. There was an…” she paused, trying to find the right words. “Incident. She’s awake now but -“
Vash didn’t get to finish as Flynt swept past her and towards the cabin. Behind him, he could hear Madbrook asking Sabrina what had happened, and as he pushed open the door he heard the words fight and attack. In the moments it took to cross the threshold, his mind raced through several possibilities, none of them good.
The clan members that had not been waiting outside were gathered around the couch. They looked up as he entered the room, and those who stood between him and the couch hastily backed away. As Llewelyn moved aside to let him approach, the person who had been the focus of their attention-and his-was revealed.
Kahreen sat in the middle of the couch, an old blanket wrapped around her shoulders. She tried to get up as Flynt approached, but as her strength seemed to fail her, she was forced to sink back down and wait the few moments it took for Flynt to cross the room and reach her side.
“Hi.” She smiled weakly at him as he dropped to his knees before her, his worried gaze straying to the silver streak running through her hair. His hand reached up timidly, almost afraid that his touch would cause her to shatter, and ran his talons over the silver strands.
“What happened?” he whispered, his eyes now finding hers. “Are you alright? Did anyone -”
“I’m fine…now,” she assured him, taking his hand in her own. “And no one did this to me. These past few days…what happened before…was too much for this old body of mine to handle. The system overloaded.”
“She wandered off into the woods,” Vash spoke up, moving towards them. “I went to bring her back, but when I found her-”
“I snapped and attacked her,” Kahreen finished. “It isn’t her fault,” she added as Flynt glared at Vash. “Flynt,” she continued, her voice now sounding tired. “I’ll be ok. I just need to rest, regain my strength. I’ll be up and about again by tomorrow night. No lasting damage.”
“Are you sure?” he asked, not quite believing her. Lasting damage. The silver streak through her hair seemed to be just that. And if that was what showed on the outside…. He remembered what had happened the last time she had been seriously injured in her biomechanical body. Silver, while possessed by a demon called the Oni, had run her through with a sword. While Kahreen had survived that, he remembered all too well the blue liquid that had flowed over his hands, and how he had had to literally plug her into an electrical outlet to prevent her from bleeding to death.
It was those memories that stayed with him now. His eyes strayed to her hands, still bandaged. How long had it taken for them to heal…if they ever had?
As if she sensed what was going on in his mind, Kahreen raised one hand and gently brought Flynt’s face around to face her own. “It might take a while for my body to sort itself out, but it will heal. I’d know if something was seriously wrong.”
“If you’re certain,” Flynt began, still sounding unsure. “I don’t want-”
“It’ll be alright,” she replied, bringing him closer and gently caressing his brow ridges. “All I need is some time, and you. That’s all.”
This answer seemed to satisfy him and he stood. “Is there anything you need?”
“You know the answer to that,” she smiled. “But no, the others have been looking after me, although it’s probably more than I deserve, given the way I’ve been acting these past few days.” The smile left her lips.
“We’re clan…and we understand. You don’t have to explain,” Sabrina said, coming over to the couch with a mug of soup and carefully passing it over to Kahreen. “I know you don’t eat that much, but you look like you need this.”
Her smile returning, Kahreen took the mug from her. “Thank you,” she said. For a moment she stared into the steaming liquid contents and then suddenly she gave a small laugh. “It seems that whenever I’ve been ill someone has given me this stuff.” She glanced up at Flynt “No matter where I am or what form I’m in.” She held out the mug to him. “Remember?”
“I remember,” he said as he took it gently from her.
“It’s a little hot,” Kahreen explained, seeing a small frown cross Sabrina’s face. “When it cools, I’ll drink it. I promise.”
Sabrina nodded and walked away, making eye contact with Vash. The second-in-command nodded and indicated the front door with a tilt of her head. One by one, the clan filtered outside, leaving Kahreen and Flynt alone.
Once everyone was outside, Vash gently closed the door behind her.
“Why are we out here?” asked Ed as he drew his coat tighter around him. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for giving them a private moment. But why are we the ones freezing our backsides off? Couldn’t they have gone into the bedroom or something?”
“If you don’t stop whining, I’ll find something to warm you up,” Malachi growled. “And believe me, you won’t like it.”
“That’s enough, both of you,” Vash said as she padded softly to the window and glanced in. Her eyes narrowed and she let out a long, slow breath as she turned back to the clan. “Kahreen says she’ll be alright, but I don’t believe her. What happened on the ridge… that was no small thing you can just brush aside.”
“But she’s not like the rest of us,” Llewelyn reminded everyone. “I mean, she’d know if something was wrong, right?”
“So she’s either deluding herself or she’s lying.” Shaiya folded her arms and glowered.
Silver shook her head. “But why would she lie to Flynt? To protect him?”
“Or she could be telling the truth and we should mind our own damn business.” Ansalong spat. “Look, I’m not going to stand here and gossip. If you have a beef with Kahreen, then tell her. Don’t bitch about her behind her back. Now if you’ll excuse me, I haven’t had anything warm to drink in twenty-four hours, and junior over there-” she said, indicating Chaz with a nod of her head, “-is starting to look like a good fallback option.”
As Ansalong walked away, Gigi looked from her to the clan. “She’s right, you know.”
“About what? Minding our own business or the food?” asked Vash with a grimace.
“Both,” she replied as she turned and followed the gray vampire.
“Good riddance,” muttered Llewelyn as Gigi and Ansalong disappeared into the woods. “So what do we do?”
Eight pairs of eyes turned to Vashkoda.
“It’s been a long night,” she admitted. “And perhaps it’s too soon to know anything. Maybe Kahreen is telling the truth, maybe she isn’t. But Flynt needs to believe she is, and we need Flynt.”
“So we keep quiet and play along?” Madbrook shook his head. “I’m sorry, Vash, but that doesn’t sound right.”
“Right or wrong, it doesn’t matter. It’s all we can do.” She folded her arms and shook her head.
“Perhaps it is only a temporary setback to Kahreen’s recovery. With luck, hopefully she’ll take her rightful place in the clan.”
“What? As Second?” Ed gave a wry smile. “And where does that leave you, Vash?”
“In my rightful place,” she answered, moving away from the cabin. “We’ll give them a little more time and then we’ll go back in.”
“I think I’ll spend a bit more time with the ship’s computer,” Madbrook said, understanding what Vashkoda was saying.
Llewelyn shrugged. “I guess we’ll go play hunt the stick again. What do you say Chaz?”
“What? Go into the woods with Ans having a serious attack of the munchies?” He made a face. “No thanks.”
“Good point. Okay then, how about a spot of aimless gliding?”
“And what if someone saw you?” asked Silver.
Llew sighed. “How about we sit on our tails and do nothing then?”
“Not really,” Silver smiled. “I have something both of you can help me with.” She motioned for both of them to follow her around to the rear of the cottage.
Llew and Chaz exchanged looks. “That sounded something suspiciously like chores,” Chaz grumbled. “I don’t suppose we could go hunt the stick after all?”
“You had your chance, kid,” Llew smiled. “Now move your tail.” She gave the youngster a gentle push and the trio disappeared around the corner.
“You know, if we’re going to pretend that everything’s hunky-dory, shouldn’t we get back inside?” Ed stamped his feet and rubbed his hands together. “I mean, I understand about respectful distances and all, but don’t you think Flynt’s going to think something’s up if we keep avoiding them?”
“He’s right.” Ed looked up in surprise as Malachi spoke. He was actually agreeing with him? “I mean, Flynt will know something is going on if this fellow actually braves the elements for more than five minutes.”
“Oh, well thank you very much.” Ed shot Malachi a dirty look.
Malachi smiled slyly as he knelt by Dog and gave the animal an affectionate scratch between the ears. “Or we could just wait until you freeze to death, and then gift wrap you for Flynt. I’m sure that would cheer him up.”
Vash let out a growl of frustration. “As I told you two before, that’s enough! Go back inside the cabin or out into the woods, I don’t care. Just don’t bicker in front of Flynt.”
“She’s right.” Shaiya said, eyeing both Malachi and Ed. “It’s not fair of us to add to the burden on Flynt’s shoulders. It’s heavy enough as it is.”
“Well standing here and talking isn’t going to get us anywhere. Unless anyone’s got something new to say….” Ed paused. When no one replied, he continued. “No? Well then, if it’s alright with you, Vash, I’d like to go in.”
“Fine,” Vash sighed. “Just remember-”
“I’ll be on my best behavior,” Ed promised as he turned and opened the door, slipping inside.
“I’ll be glad when this is all past and things can get back to normal again,” added Sabrina as she followed Ed into the cabin. Cairo, Malachi and Cesar soon joined her. Only Vash and Shaiya remained, and Shaiya had already begun moving towards the door. Before passing through, she gave Vash an encouraging look.
Now alone on the porch and alone with her thoughts, the clan’s second-in-command watched the retreating forms of the clan and her hopes of resuming the search for Duval slipping further and further away.
******
Mord appeared back in his office, surrounded by an aura of green light. As it began to fade, Mord stumbled forward, grabbing the edge of his desk to stop himself from falling. Breathe in, breathe out, he reminded himself.
He straightened slowly, looking around him to make sure that no one had observed his return. It wouldn’t do for any of the staff to see him like this, disheveled and uncomposed. He made another quick sweep of the room. Still alone…but was he? Was it possible to do anything without the directors knowing? No matter; they knew now and he would have to simply deal with it.
Reaching forward, he picked up the phone and dialed the number of his lab. The man who answered sounded exhausted. In the background, Mord could hear a low monotonal chant. Good, they were prepared.
“I’ve had a meeting with the Directors.” There was silence on the other end of the line, but Mord knew that there were now several pairs of ears listening. “Our schedule has been moved forward.” Mord took a deep breath before continuing. “We also have one extra item to prepare, so be ready to go at a moment’s notice.”
Finally the voice on the other end spoke again. “Extra item? But what for?”
“You don’t need to know. Let’s just say that we’re going to be killing several birds with one stone.” With that, he replaced the receiver and strode towards the door. He had to supervise all of this personally; nothing could go wrong. Maybe he had underestimated the Directors. They knew how to play the game as well as he did. But the directors were only interested in one thing-their ceremony. Anything beyond that was Mord’s domain, and he knew how to play that particular arena.
******
“
You know, I was beginning to think that you’d never wake up.”Flynt looked up and around, finding Kahreen sitting in a low chair by the window. Behind her the light of the day was fading fast, but those few remaining rays of red lent some of their warmth to her otherwise pale features. A warmth that was almost lost when he looked from her face to the streak of silver in her hair.
She frowned and got up slowly from the chair. “It still bothers you, doesn’t it?
“To tell you the truth, yes, it does,” he answered, stretching and causing the last stray pieces of stone skin to fall from his body. He then moved towards her, caping his wings around his shoulders. “But you said you would get better,” he smiled. “And you have, much better than last night.” His smile faded as he continued. “But are you ready for tonight? If you want to wait it’d be all right. I think he’d understand.”
She shook her head, closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around his waist. “We talked about this last night, while the others were giving us ample breathing space. I need to do this. So do you.” She let out a shaky sigh and laid her head on his chest. “I need to say goodbye, Flynt.”
“I know,” he said, bringing his arms around and holding her. “I know.”
Moments passed, neither one moving or saying anything. Finally, Kahreen raised her head. “I guess we’d better go and tell the clan. If we stay here much longer the night will be over.”
“You’re right.” Flynt gave a sad smile and stepped backwards, holding out his hand. “If you’re ready, my Love.”
“As I’ll ever be,” she answered, placing her hand in his and then, together they walked towards the door.
******
“The Wind Ceremony has been a part of us since the beginning of time. Further back than before I was hatched. I don’t think Gargoyles have ever truly belonged to the earth. We feel freer, more alive when our wings are open and the night breeze carries us. Even in death that breeze will still carry us. That is why we have the Wind Ceremony.”
Flynt looked upwards, taking in the multitude of brilliant stars that blanketed the crystal clear night sky. Slowly, his eyes traveled down, past the tree line and into the clearing where the clan had gathered. Finally his attention focused on the small fire that blazed in the middle of the clearing. “That is why we are here,” he continued, more softly now.
Around him the clan listened. When Flynt and Kahreen announced earlier that night that they intended to hold a Wind Ceremony for their son, none were surprised. Some, like Ed, were unsure what the ceremony was about, save for the fact that it seemed to be some sort of memorial/funeral rite. Now, standing in a clearing atop the cliffs that rose behind the clan’s new-albeit temporary-home, that vague understanding was now becoming undeniable fact. Flynt had asked each of the clan to bring one piece of wood to add to the fire. One by one they had made their way up to the clearing and once there, Flynt and Kahreen laid their pieces of wood on the ground. The clan followed suit and when the last piece of wood had been added, Flynt asked Llewelyn to light the fire. As the flames began to rise, Flynt spoke, telling the clan about the Wind Ceremony. What came next was much harder; the most difficult part. Now the leader of this small clan had to tell them about who they were here for.
His son.
Flynt stepped closer to the fire as he spoke, his voice soft as he struggled with his emotions.
“We are here to honor the memory of one whose time was all too brief. My son-” he paused, his eyes flicking to his mate. “Our son, Tethys. We were truly blessed. A beautiful babe, a part of Kah and myself. I remember, the first time I gazed into his face…”
Flynt paused again, swallowing at the lump in his throat. He stared at the fire, the flames becoming blurry and indistinct as tears filled his eyes.
“Tethys, in the short time you blessed us with your light, you brought such joy into my life.” The tears flowed freely now, but Flynt’s voice was strong and clear. “The love and pride I feel in my heart from knowing you, holding you, being a part of your life; that is something I will cherish for the rest of my days.”
Flynt knelt by the fire, eyes unfocused, the smoke twisting in delicate spirals before him.
“With all my love, my son,” he said softly. “Let the winds guide your spirit straight and true. Farewell Tethys, until the day our souls meet again.”
As Flynt finished speaking, his final words hung in the cold air, waiting, remaining, lingering. It seemed as if they formed images that danced in the flickering light of the fire. And then, as Kahreen stepped forward the wind picked up and swept those images away. For a moment there was silence, and Flynt, worried that this might have been too much for her, took a step forward, one arm reaching for her. As his hand fell gently on her shoulder, Kahreen raised her head and looked into the fire.
“I’m older, much older than most of you here,” she said, slowly looking at each clan member in turn. “Although I know now that age has nothing at all to do with truly living. In that respect I’m no older than a child. And it is because of a child-my son, that I learned this.” She now moved her arm up and across her body and laid her hand on top of Flynt’s.
“When I first became flesh and blood, I didn’t realize what had been given to me. I continued with my life as I had always done. Things were different. I knew that. But I don’t think I knew how different until…” her expression glazed over, became inward and a wistful smile played around her lips. She blinked and her attention returned to the fire. “I didn’t know what it meant to have your whole joined to another, your body, your so-“ she frowned as a small puzzled look crossed her face. “I don’t think I fully appreciated what a gift comes from such a union. That’s what he was, a wonderful, beautiful gift. To feel him growing inside me and then to feel him in my arms, to look into his eyes and see the soul inside. I -“ her voice faltered, her eyes closed and she stepped backwards, only opening her eyes as she felt Flynt’s strong arms encircle and embrace her. “Thank you,” she said to the flames. “Thank you for being part of me, even if it was only for a short time. Sleep well my pảisde, sleep well, Tethys.”
As she finished speaking, there was a moment of silence, much longer than the one that had passed between Flynt and Kahreen’s words. Part of it was out of respect, the rest was an uncertain hesitation among the clan as to who would speak next. None had known Tethys. They had only known the heartache his loss had caused his parents. Eventually it was Vashkoda who stepped forward to break the silence.
“I never knew Tethys,” she began. “But I know that he would have possessed the best qualities of both his parents,” she said, nodding to Kahreen and Flynt. “I also know that every life-however brief-has an important role to play in the great scheme of things. No life, no death is not without it’s reason, even if we cannot see it. I lost my daughter to the past but I know that she and her descendents prevailed,” here she glanced at Cairo. “And for that I am proud.” With that she lowered her head and stepped back, waiting for the next clan member to speak.
*******
He watched from the edge of the clearing and listened as both Kahreen and Flynt talked about their son. He listened as Vashkoda and others in the clan parted with their own thoughts about this child. A child he had never met; a child who had died before his parents had even returned to this world. And yet…and yet this child, this shadow seemed to be more a part of this clan than he could ever hope to be, not even if he stayed with this clan for the rest of his natural life. Cesar took one uncertain step back into the shadows. He had nothing to say, nothing that would honor this child in the way he should be.
Nothing to say but perhaps-perhaps there was something he could do. He knew for certain that it was Varges he had seen lurking near the ruins of the Zentech building. Varges, the man who had led the assault on the clan’s home all those months ago and had driven them from it, the same man who had later betrayed his trust and had tried to kill him. Cesar turned and took one last look at the scene he was leaving behind; the three mated pairs, Silver and her son, the clan. They were all family; he could see that-a good place to be, good people to be around, but now, more than ever, he felt like the outsider.
“Better t’be on the outside of this than on the inside of people like Zentech,” he whispered softly to himself as he turned away from the circle of light and started walking down the slope. “And ah can make sure that at least he doesn’t bother you anymore.”
******
“And I’m sorry I never got to meet him. He sounded like a great kid,” Ed finished and stepped backwards, the last clan member to speak about Flynt and Kahreen’s son.
By now the fire had burned down and all that remained were glowing embers, but even so the ceremony wasn’t over. Now both Kahreen and Flynt moved forward, stopping only when they were close to the fire. Kahreen reached into her pocket and brought out a small package wrapped in white cloth. Slowly, almost reluctantly she unwrapped it, revealing an even smaller piece of cloth inside. It was a study in contrasts, the dark turquoise of this tattered fabric was covered in a number of stains, each standing out against the pure white of their wrapping.
“This is all we have left,” Kahreen, said “All we brought back with us. We can’t cremate his body, as we should. That’s far away in time and space.” She stroked the fabric and then held it up to her face, drinking in its scent-his scent one last time. Then, her hands shaking slightly she passed the cloth to Flynt.
“But we do have this,” he said, scenting the fabric as Kahreen had done. “The only physical remains of our son in this world, and it is this we consign to the flames.” He held the cloth out above the fire. Kahreen reached out and laid her hand on top of Flynt’s and together, as one they let the cloth fall down onto the embers. Within seconds the fabric began smoldering and moments later it was ablaze. Now, his voice filled with emotion said his last farewell to his son.
“Ashes to ashes…fly free my son.”
And then there was no more to say, nothing to do but to watch the embers cool down.
******
As the ceremony ended the clan drifted away one by one: each with their own thoughts. Eventually only Kahreen and Flynt were left in the clearing. For a long time they watched the embers burn down and the warmth the fire had given fade from the air.
“I never thought about it until now,” Kahreen said softly, her eyes traveling from the ashes up towards the night sky.
“About what?”
“What happens after…I mean for organics- what happens after the body dies? I mean really happens? I know people on this world have different beliefs; I know what people on a thousand different worlds believe. But I don’t know what I believe. Not any more.”
Flynt frowned and gently turned his mate around so that she was facing him. “Kahreen,” he said. “He has gone on and wherever that is he’ll be safe.”
“I know, I know,” she said, glancing back at the ashes “And I know when the time comes, you-you’ll find him again. You’ll see him again. But I…” she trailed off, biting her bottom lip. “I’m not sure if I have anything to go on with.”
Flynt blinked, an expression of surprise and worry crossing his face. His grip tightened on her shoulders and he-perhaps without even realizing it-his eyes flashed and a growl escaped his lips. Kahreen looked up, her eyes widening in surprise. “Flynt…”
“Don’t you say that, don’t you ever say that,” he said with such vehemence that each word was punctuated with a growl. “A thing without a soul does not give life to someone like Tethys. A thing without a soul doesn’t make me feel complete. I wouldn’t love, I wouldn’t die for something that doesn’t have a soul.” His expression softened and he continued. “You, me, Tethys - we’ll see each other again. We’ll be together again. I promise you this.”
“You promise? Are you sure?”
“As sure as the sun will rise.”
She sighed, more a sigh of relief than of resignation and walked over to the remains of the fire. Reaching down, she picked up some of the ashes and watched as they slipped between her fingers. Flynt followed her, watching as she straightened up and turned to face him. “Thank you,” she said as she walked towards him and into his embrace.
“For what?” he said, stroking her hair.
“For being right,” she answered. “Just for being right.”
******
“Cesar’s gone.”
Those were the words that greeted Kahreen and Flynt as they returned to the cottage. It was now only an hour before sunrise and some of the clan were already preparing for the coming day’s sleep. Others, however, seemed to be worried about Cesar’s disappearance.
“Maybe he just went off somewhere to think.” Flynt said, closing the door behind him.
“Maybe…or he could be well on his way to Newbridge.” Malachi growled. “He may have helped us out once… twice,” he added as he caught the expression on Cairo’s face. “But if he goes back and gets caught, then Zentech’s going to be knocking on our door in no time.”
“You know, he might be right,” Madbrook said, adding his own thoughts to Malachi’s. “You saw him last night, Flynt,” he said, turning to the clan leader. “Something about the old Zentech site really got him riled up.”
“Look, just because he didn’t come back with us does not make this a crisis,” Sabrina said. “Flynt’s right. He probably went somewhere to think. You can’t say that you haven’t wanted to find your own quiet corner, Embee.”
Madbrook nodded, knowing what his mate had said was true. That night’s ceremony had allowed thoughts about the clones killed by Zentech, of those people he and Sabrina had met during their travels through time, to rise to the surface. “I know, and I mean no disrespect, Flynt, Kahreen. But…”
“Zentech’s still fresh in your mind,” Kahreen spoke for the first time since coming back the cabin. “But does it really matter if they find out about this place? By the time they got here we would have been long gone.”
Some turned to look at Kahreen in mild surprise. Others-those that had known her before she and Flynt had disappeared-exchanged hopeful looks. This sounded more like the Kahreen they had known before, someone vastly different from the withdrawn individual who had been amongst them only two nights ago. Even Flynt regarded her with surprise before a warm smile crossed his face.
“Flynt mentioned that we were moving on and I agree with him,” she continued. “The sooner the better. There’s nothing to keep us here.”
And she was right. There was nothing keeping them there. Not now. Kahreen, it seemed, was well on the road to recovery and they had found Malachi and Cairo’s pet dog. There was only the question of Cesar, and with this rising optimism, it seemed that he would come back and then, then they would leave this place and look for somewhere to finally call home. They would get away from Zentech, away from all the tethers of the past that haunted them here. Onto a fresh start and a more settled life.
Now the questions started. Where would they go? When? Places were suggested. Where? Anywhere. They had the entire planet to choose from.
Flynt listened and let their words wash over him, let their hopes soothe him. A greater healing came as he saw Kahreen take an active part in the discussion. Here was hope, and when she looked over her shoulder and smiled at him, he saw something else…
…A future. One he was willing to risk everything to protect.
******
Ed and Shaiya found her sometime after noon, curled in a fetal position towards the rear of her ship. Disks and circuit boards lay scattered across the floor in a pool of water. A glass, shattered into a hundred jagged pieces, lay just beyond her still shaking body. It was frightening, seeing firsthand the scene that Vashkoda had described to them after Kahreen’s first seizure.
They ran to her, wanting to help but not knowing what to do. It was Shaiya who reached her first and knelt down by her side. Ed hung back.
“Kahreen?” she said. “Kahreen, can you hear me?”
Her only reply was a low moan.
“Shaiya?”
The petite female looked up. Ed was standing a few feet away, a look of worry and confusion on his face.
“What?”
“Is there something I can do?” His gaze shifted, lingered on Kahreen for a second and then quickly moved back to Shaiya.
She thought for a moment. All they could do was what had been done after the first attack. “Get some blankets,” she said. “We have to make her comfortable; wait for this to subside.”
“Right.” Ed nodded and left the ship.
Shaiya listened to the sound of Ed’s feet running across the clearing and then the distant sound of the cabin door opening and closing. It wouldn’t take long for him to find the blankets. In the meantime she would do her best to make the stricken biomech comfortable.
‘If that was possible’, she thought as she looked down at Kahreen. Blankets wouldn’t make much of a difference to her; at least she didn’t think so. ‘No, the blankets are for our comfort. They make us feel better because we know this is bad.’
And would this condition continue to worsen? It seemed Vashkoda had been right in her misgivings about Kahreen’s promise that she would get better.
‘Did you lie to us?’ she silently asked her. From somewhere in the distance there came the sound of the cabin door opening again. Ed was returning. Shaiya looked up and watched the entrance to the ship as the sound of Ed’s footsteps increased in volume.
“Sh…”
Shaiya looked down. That shaky word had come from Kahreen. The biomech’s eyes were now open and it was clear that this attack had done more than just increase the volume of silver in her hair. The ‘whites’ of her eyes, once a pale yellow, were now criss-crossed with a number of green lines, all radiating out from behind her pupils.
Unable to stop herself, Shaiya gasped. It wasn’t the change in her eyes that had startled her. No, it was the look in them that was unnerving. Confusion, surprise and fear. Each of these emotions battled for dominance in those eyes, and it was from this Shaiya learned one thing.
Kahreen hadn’t been lying to them. She had truly believed that her first seizure would be her only one, that she would recover, maybe not to the level she had been at when she and Flynt had disappeared but to a point that she would be able to continue on without too many changes.
But this attack had brought an ugly truth with it. Where there had been one seizure there would be another…and another. The only awful question was simple. At what point would they stop, and what would remain after?
******
‘Should have known that the end of last night was too good to be true,’ Ed thought as he quickly crossed the clearing, blankets clasped tightly to his chest. ‘But if you think this is bad, wait until sunset.’ The scene he was returning to in the ship was unnerving, but what he had seen in the cabin had somehow been worse. Seeing the positive expressions frozen on the sleeping faces of the clan had brought forward feelings of guilt, and so he had done his best to avoid looking at them. Instead, he had made a beeline for the closet where the blankets were stored and had grabbed as many as he could carry. However, when he had turned around and come face to face with Flynt’s statue, the blankets he had been carrying fell to the ground. He had picked them up quickly and had hurried out of the cabin as fast as he could. For one terrifying moment, an image had flashed across his mind. Flynt’s statue had suddenly come to life and the gargoyle was reaching for him, his eyes ablaze. The gargoyle uttered no words, but the message in his eyes was clear. I told you what would happen if you didn’t look after her.
Ed shuddered at the thought. It seemed that Flynt’s almost constant threats to him since his return to the clan had left their mark. Thaylog’s video message to Ed had mentioned that Flynt had suffered at the hands of humans, that he might not be able to forgive them. Well, Thaylog had been right. Since Ed was the only human-New Olympian form aside-in the clan, he had become the target for many of Flynt’s frustrations. True, there had never been any physical violence, but the threat had at times been only a hair’s breadth away. Perhaps, Ed thought as he boarded the ship, perhaps it would be best if he made himself scarce around Flynt, or at the very least keep at least one other clan member between them.
Did he feel selfish? Did he feel guilt about thinking about himself when the leader’s mate was possibly dying a few meters away? The answer was yes to both questions, but the last few months had taught him some important lessons about survival.
And he didn’t quite fancy dying just yet.
“These were all I could find,” he said as he knelt down beside Shaiya and placed the blankets on the floor beside him.
“Thank you.” Shaiya nodded and gestured to the blankets. “Fold one up and put it beneath her head. Then cover her with another one.”
As Ed made to move past Shaiya, Kahreen opened her eyes and tried to move her head. However even that seemed to be too much for her and a weak hiss of frustration passed her lips.
“I…I don’t n…need…”
“Yes you do,” said Shaiya as she gestured to Ed to continue. “For the moment you do need us. Rest, get your strength back.”
“No…I need…need to…” she tapered off as Ed gently raised her head, placed a folded blanket beneath it and then gently lowered her head back onto it.
“Umm Shaiya, I know bugger all about this stuff, but perhaps she’s trying to tell us that there’s something in here that will help her recover faster - or something like that anyway.” Ed shrugged as he began to unfold another blanket.
“Maybe,” Shaiya mused as she helped Ed spread the blanket over the stricken biomech. “You weren’t with the clan at the time, but Silver had been possessed by the Oni.”
Ed shuddered, remembering his own encounter with the Oni. “I remember Vash telling me about that.”
With a slight nod of her head Shaiya continued. “She - rather the Oni-ran Kahreen through with a sword. Flynt helped to heal Kahreen by plugging her into a power source.”
“Well why don’t we do that then?”
“Because I wasn’t there, Ed. I cannot take the chance of causing her further harm by trying to do something I know nothing about.”
“Then ask her,” Ed said looking at Kahreen. “She’s awake now. I mean, you’d be able to tell us yes or no, right?”
This last question was directed at Kahreen, and although the biomech glanced at him, signaling that she’d heard him, at first there seemed to be no reply. She frowned and closed her eyes, and then uttered the only word they would hear her speak for some time.
“Wait.”
***
“How long?”
Mord blinked and quickly brought back to the brilliantly lit room surrounding him. For the past hour he had watched as the figure in the tank before him aged. This morning it had been nothing more than an embryo, created from injecting DNA extracted from the blood in the amulet into a surrogate egg. When cellular division had begun, the embryo was placed in the nutrient tank, but not before a spell had been placed on it; a simple spell developed by the now defunct New Orleans branch of Zentech.
Mord thought it ironic that the branch of Zentech to first encounter this clan of gargoyles and be defeated by them was also the same branch that would provide they key to their defeat - that and so much more.
Simple, yet brilliant, and it was this concept that Mord was using to develop this embryo. No technology would be used to grow this child to maturity. No, he wanted this to be a blank slate, ready to be written to when the time was right. He wanted this to be perfect, to be an exact copy. There had been a problem, one that had been inherent with all clones that had been created up to this point. The accelerated growth technology that had been used created slight mutations in the clone’s cellular structure. Mainly it had only shown itself in the odd pigmentation of the clone and sometimes - as he had discovered himself at Ceighton Park -the mutation was so bad that the clone could not survive outside the tank.
To avoid this, Mord had gone back to the one thing that had ensured his own survival over the centuries.
Magic.
One day- Mord told himself- he would have to find the halfling who had written this knowledge down and thank him, although he didn’t think that Thoth would have ever imagined this particular application of his spell. It had been cast on the tank once the embryo had been placed within. What it did was to speed up time within the tank. The problem of providing what would essentially be fifty years’ worth of nutrients had been easily overcome. Now all that remained was to wait.
And that brought him to the question at hand.
“How long?” he shrugged. “I’m not sure. It could be hours, it could be days but it has to be before the date the directors have set.” He glanced at the technician who had asked the question. “That’s what you wanted to know, isn’t it?”
“Not exactly sir. I…”
“It’s all you need to know.” This time there was a tone of warning to Mord’s voice. “Everything has been prepared. All we have to do is have patience.” He turned and resumed his watch of the tank. “Trust me, it would be better for your health.”
***
By his reckoning, it had been well over two hours before Kahreen opened her eyes again. Two hours for her to regain the strength for whatever it was she was planning to do. Ed slouched back in the pilot’s chair and glanced out of the front view window. It would be what?-two, maybe two and a half hours until sunset, and then once Flynt and the rest of the clan were awake, it would become pretty hectic inside.
But he wondered if the noise, the worry that would come, would be preferable to the silence that had dominated the past hour and a half. Kahreen said nothing, and aside from a brief conversation with Shaiya, the petite, white-haired female hadn’t spoken either. She sat cross-legged next to Kahreen, her eyes closed. Ed wondered if she had fallen asleep. After all, as far as he knew she had been up for twenty-four hours, perhaps more. Hell, he knew he was tired, the three hours of sleep he had managed to grab that morning were nowhere close to recharging him.
Recharging. He guessed that was what Kahreen was doing, waiting until she had enough strength to get up and about on her own. This, he thought, was pretty stupid. Both he and Shaiya were willing to help her, and if it was a matter of pride, of not wanting to look weak, then he was sure that that ship had sailed long ago.
Still, if she told them ‘wait’, then there wasn’t much else they could do.
“Ed?”
Except now it seemed the waiting was over. Ed got up out of the pilot’s chair and walked down into the main cabin. Shaiya was now beside Kahreen, helping the biomech get up off the floor.
“Ed, could you help-“
“I’m ok Shaiya,” Kahreen cut her off. “Look, I appreciate you staying with me, both of you,” she added as Ed reached them. “But I can get about on my own now.”
“Then you won’t mind if we stay near you to be at hand if you need us,” Shaiya said. “It’s still a distance to the cottage, and you haven’t been on your feet for two hours.
Kahreen sighed. “I’m not going to go back to the cottage, not yet. There’s something I need to check, something I need to confirm.”
“What?”
“Don’t ask me, not yet,” Kahreen said, avoiding eye contact with them. “Just help me up into the pilot’s chair. I can handle the rest myself.”
Ed frowned. “But I thought you said you didn’t want-“
“Don’t ask, Ed, just help her.” Shaiya scowled at him as she laid one supporting hand on Kahreen’s arm.
Shrugging, Ed took her other arm and together, he and Shaiya helped Kahreen up into the cockpit and towards to pilot’s seat. As they neared it, the material covering the head and arm rests melted away to reveal pads that glowed a pale green. Ed and Shaiya hesitated.
“What?”
“Don’t worry, it’s a diagnostic tool. I just haven’t used it in the past few years. Maybe I should have,” she added more quietly. With their help she sat down, grimacing when her wrists and her head came into contact with the pads.
Shaiya frowned. ”If this hurts you…”
“It’s ok, it’s okay.” Kahreen opened her eyes. “I just forgot how powerful these connections could be.”
“Connections?” Ed asked. “What exactly are you going to do?”
“Compare diagnostics from five years ago with today.”
“What will that show?” Ed asked, curiosity getting in the way of his better judgment and most certainly getting in the way of the disapproving looks Shaiya was giving him.
However Kahreen did not answer. She glanced at him quickly, and then closed her eyes as the light from the pads flared, and in response every light on the consol began to glow.
“Well that’s one way to avoid answering a question,” Ed said. “So how long do we wait this time?”
“It’s a question you shouldn’t have asked, and we’ll wait as long as we have to.” Shaiya folded her arms and glared at Ed. “There is only one person here who will hear anything Kahreen has to say first, and you know as well as I that that person is neither of us.”
“Fine, fine,” Ed held up his hands. “I’ll play the deaf, blind and mute monkey but it doesn’t stop me from being worried that even with the hell we went through last year, fate is gearing up for a grand finale.”
“And if it is, we’ll face it. This clan that Thaylog started will stand against any wind of change.”
Ed looked up and shrugged. “Maybe so, but it’s not going to help her any, is it?” he asked, indicating Kahreen.
Shaiya said nothing.
“I thought so,” Ed said, turning to leave. “I’m not going to be needed here now, am I?”
Shaiya shook her head. “No.”
“Ok then,” Ed yawned and rubbed the back of his head. “I’m going to get some caffeine in me. Do you want anything?”
Shaiya considered this for a moment and then looked at him, and for the first time Ed saw something that he had never seen in Shaiya’s eyes before; worry.
“Hope,” she said, sitting down in the navigator’s chair. “If nothing else, that’s what we’ll need tonight.”
“Umm, yeah.” Ed turned and walked away, out of the ship and into the cool night air. Without being conscious of it, Ed’s first few steps brought him close to the cabin, close enough so that he could see the shadowy forms of the still sleeping clan through the window. He stopped, now uncertain whether he wanted to open the door and walk past Flynt -and that vision-again. There was no back door to the cabin, no way to sneak in and avoid the tan gargoyle.
Suddenly he decided he wasn’t all that keen for tea, coffee - any kind of caffeine. Perhaps it would be better just to wait it out in the ship. Wait for Kahreen to finish whatever it was she was doing and then…
…and then he didn’t know. It depended on what Kahreen said, on Flynt’s reaction to it, on the clan’s reaction to it, hell on the whole universes reaction to it and when push came to shove, there wasn’t much else he could do but roll with it. But perhaps, perhaps Kahreen would find something in her diagnosis that could be fixed, that she could put a halt on before it got much worse. It was a wild hope, he knew that, but it could happen. Anything was possible.
“Ed?”
Even the good, he thought as he turned back to face the ship and saw Shaiya illuminated by the light from the hatch.
“Is she finished? Did she find anything?” he asked as he walked back to the ship. As he drew closer and saw the expression on Shaiya’s face, that small hope died.
“She found something,” she said as she helped Ed back into the ship and led him to the front of the vessel. “But…”
There was no need to say more. Kahreen sat in the pilot’s chair, leaning forward, her head between her hands. As Ed listened, he could make out a low sound, a noise coming from Kahreen, one made up of a single word repeated over and over again.
“…no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no…”
“Umm Kahreen?” Ed spoke. He knew that he should stay silent and wait until she was ready to talk to them , but then there was that noise-and he couldn’t stand it.
Kahreen stopped, raised her head and looked at him, and Ed found himself wishing that she went back to repeating ‘no’ again, anything other than to have to look at the expression in her eyes. For a time she said nothing, she just sat there and stared at them and then slowly her head turned so that she was looking out of the front view window.
“How long is it until sunset?” she asked, to him, to Shaiya, to no one in particular.
Ed checked his watch. “About an hour.” He glanced at Shaiya in a silent appeal for help.
The silver haired female nodded and moved closer to Kahreen. “Is there anything you want us to do?” she softly asked, laying a pale hand on her shoulder. “Anything you need?”
Kahreen glanced at the hand and then up at Shaiya. “Could you leave me alone for a while? Please?” she added. “I…I need to think. Oh, this is a mess. It’s not fair, not fair…”
Doing the only thing they could do, Shaiya and Ed made themselves scarce, leaving the ship and crossing the long shadows that lay between them and the cabin. The sun was already close to the horizon, looking old and tired. They stopped and watched it for a while before walking over to the edge of the porch and sitting by it. From here they could watch the sun set and at the same time watch the ship and wait until Kahreen needed them again. It was only a matter of which would come first, the night or Kahreen…
…If night hadn’t already overtaken her.
***
The sound of roaring filled the cabin as the sun dipped below the horizon. Those inside, unaware of what lay beyond the front door, were eager to continue the discussion begun the night before. The conversation bounced across the cabin as the clan moved about. Flynt looked around. Kahreen was nowhere to be seen. That in itself didn’t concern him; she was probably outside, working on the ship and preparing it for another journey. Still, he couldn’t help but want to be near her when he woke up. He headed towards the door, catching fragments of the conversations going on around him.
“What about New Olympus? I mean there are no humans there and it sounds like it’s well hidden. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind a few gargoyles about the place.”
“Oh sure. Great idea!” Llewelyn called from beside the fire. “Wonderful! Except for two important facts, that is. One, it’s well hidden. What do you think our chances of finding it are? And two, it wasn’t that long ago that we had a New Olympian running around trying to kill Ed.”
“What?” Flynt stopped mid step and turned back to the clan. “When did this happen?”
“Oh, a few months ago. Anyway she’s dead, but from what I gather there were more like her on New Olympus, and if Ed goes back he’ll probably be killed or something.”
“And that’s a problem?” Malachi asked as he fed Dog.
“It is if he’s the only one who could remember how to get there. I mean, would you show people the way to somewhere that only means death to you?”
“Yes, it has to be somewhere where we all can go or not at all,” Cairo mused.
“Yeah, which leaves Avalon out, too.”
“Avalon?” the Egyptian gargoyle frowned. “I don’t understand.”
“Let me explain then,” said Vash. “Two-no three,” she added casting a glance at the closet where Sabrina’s egg was safely stowed away, “members of this clan have fae blood.”
As Vashkoda began to explain about Avalon and the Gathering, Flynt opened the door and slipped out into the night. He quickly made his way across to Kahreen’s ship. As he reached the midway point, the hatch to the ship opened and Shaiya, followed by Kahreen and Ed, slowly made their way out.
Kahreen! In that moment the dread he had felt two nights ago returned with a vengeance. Even from here he could see that the silver in her hair had increased. In the two seconds it took for him to reach them, he saw only her, the tense, tired look on her face, the flash of guilt in her eyes when she saw him and oh by the dragon! Her eyes! Now he was beside her, taking her hand and holding onto her. Beside them, unnoticed, Ed began to back away towards the cabin. A moment later, Shaiya followed the New Olympian. Unaware of their departure, perhaps unaware that they had even been there, Flynt pulled away from his mate and asked the question he already knew the answer to.
“What happened? Did you-“
“Yes, it happened again,” she answered, slowly stepping forward and taking his other hand. “Flynt could you…please, would you walk with me for a while? I need to talk to you…alone.”
“About this?” he said, reaching up and taking the silver strands of her hair between his thumb and forefinger. “But you said that was a one off, that it wouldn’t happen again,” and now a trace of bewildered hurt and betrayal entered his voice. “You were getting better. You said it wouldn’t happen again, Kahreen!” His voice rose, panic and fear now lending their voices to his.
This was what Kahreen had been dreading, what she feared would happen. Already she had hurt him, washing away the hard fought ground they had gained since their return. And there was more to come.
“My love, please. I didn’t know, not then. I honestly thought it was caused by everything that happened to us, to me,” and now she looked up into his eyes, saw the worry and fear in them. “I didn’t lie to you. I would never lie to you no matter what.”
“Then what is it? Kahreen I want…I need to help you, but I can’t if you don’t tell me what is happening. These attacks, what are they?”
“I’ll tell you, but please walk with me first.” She held out her hand and slowly, almost reluctantly, as if he was entering into a bargain he couldn’t back out of, he took it, his hand engulfing hers.
“Where are we going?” he asked as they began to walk away from the ship and the cabin.
“I don’t really know,” she sighed. “Anywhere, somewhere. Let’s just put one foot in front of the other and let them take us where they will.”
No words were spoken as they crossed the clearing and into the trees. For what seemed like an eternity, neither of them spoke. They did what Kahreen had asked, simply put one foot in front of the other and moved forward. Time and time again Flynt cast a desperate inquiring glance at his mate, but not once did she look back up at him. In time, it proved to be too much and Flynt halted.
“Kahreen, please…”
“I knew we’d end up here.” Kahreen sighed and glanced up at him. “Somehow I knew.”
Flynt looked up. Before them lay the clearing where they had held the Wind Ceremony for Tethys the night before. Somehow they had come almost full circle. Just a little further ahead would be the cliff, and beyond that the cabin.
Kahreen walked on, stopping when she came to an outcrop of rocks at the edge of the clearing. Sitting down, she motioned for Flynt to join her.
He did, now half wishing that she wouldn’t say anything more, but knowing that she had to. “Kahreen? These attacks…what are they?”
“Do you remember what we talked about last night? About where Tethys had gone to?”
Flynt blinked. What had this to do with her attacks? What? Flynt suddenly sat up straight. Oh no…no…
Somehow, detached from himself, he found his voice answering, “Yes.”
She looked up at him, trying to gauge his reaction. “It wasn’t just the wind ceremony that got me thinking about that. My first attack…it made me realize that I was just as mortal as everyone else. I needed confirmation…reassurance.”
“That we would always be together…yes I remember.”
Kahreen frowned. Flynt was staring at the burnt patch of ground in the clearing.
“Flynt?”
“Go on,” he answered still staring at the fire site. Although his voice was calm, another voice inside his head was screaming. ‘Don’t you say it…don’t you dare say it. Don’t kill me…’
“After the second time I knew something was wrong, so I checked, compared the state my body is in now to what it was five years ago.”
“And?” ‘Stop it. Please stop it. I don’t want to hear it!’
“My systems are degrading. Connections are being lost. Memory, details, I know there are things I’ve forgotten.” She laughed at the irony of that statement. “These attacks, they’re a symptom, not the cause. My nanophages are doing their best, creating an incredible surge of energy in an attempt to kick-start my body…to keep it going. But…but there’s only so much they can do…I…they won’t be able to stop the degradation for much longer…”
There was a crunch as the rock beneath Flynt’s talons shattered. Kahreen started, almost shying away from him as he slowly-as if it was against his will-turned his head and looked down at her. She would never hate herself more than she did at that moment, nor loathe what she was for doing this to him, for creating the look of sheer desperation in his eyes.
“Is there any way to treat this; to stop the degradation?” The question was no more than a whisper, and yet for Flynt these words never sounded so loud, like stone scraping against stone. They hung on the edge of his world in a balance so fragile that it would only take the next word from Kahreen to send it tumbling either way.
She bit her lip and hung her head. “No.”
His world came crashing down around him.
****
Ansalong glanced up as Ed and Shaiya entered the cabin. The rest of the clan hadn’t noticed their quiet entrance. “What’s up with you two? You look like your grandmother died or something.” She trailed off as both Ed and Shaiya turned to look at her. “Oh hell.”
By now others had not only noticed their arrival but had also become aware of the despondent air around them.
“Shaiya? What happened?” Vashkoda pushed her way forward.
“Kahreen had another attack.”
“Is she alright? Is she…”
“She’s up and about now. She and Flynt went for a walk in the woods,” Ed said as he sat down heavily in a chair. “But it’s not looking good.”
“What?” Vashkoda looked from one to the other. “What do you mean?”
Ed and Shaiya glanced at each other, seemingly reluctant to go on. Finally it was Shaiya who spoke. “Kahreen did a diagnostic on herself…to find out exactly what had happened. What she found - I don’t know what it was she found, but her reaction to it-“
“Vash, it was like she’d had the worst news anyone could get.,” Ed blurted out. “She wouldn’t tell us what it was, but I…” he trailed off now, reluctant to say the words.
“We think she’s dying,” Shaiya said.
“Okay, enough of the jokes,” Llewelyn said shakily. “How about you tell us what’s really going on.”
“Llew.” Sabrina moved closer to her clan sister and laid her hands on her shoulders.
“No. This is Kahreen we’re talking about!” She turned to Vash for support. “Vash, tell them!”
But what could Vashkoda say? Kahreen hadn’t been well, not since her return to the clan. There had been some good nights - take last night for instance, but in the larger scheme of things? What Ed and Shaiya suspected wasn’t completely out of the question, but Vash hoped against hope that it was.
“I don’t know,” she finally said, looking up at Llewelyn. The expression on the halfling’s face made it clear that this wasn’t what she wanted to hear. “Perhaps it’s best if we don’t jump to any conclusions until we hear what Kahreen and Flynt have to tell us.”
“I guess,” Llewelyn glanced out of the window. “But Kahreen’s been impaled, blown up and buried! And each time she’s come back. What’s changed this time?”
It was a question none of them could answer. Something had changed. Both Kahreen and Flynt had traveled to another world, and when they returned they left behind not only their son, but also some other part of themselves. Things couldn’t be the same as they were before, but their return had renewed hope in the others that things could be stable, be safe again. But an ugly realization was starting to rear its head. All the while they had been working together to forge a new start for the clan, something else was working just as hard to unravel it.
“Damn it! I thought it was too good to be true!” Silver growled. “I thought things were supposed to be better from now on! Were they lying to us all this time?”
“Silver -“ Vash started but never finished. At that moment, as loud as if it had been uttered among them, came a howl. It chilled every one of them to the core. It was so full of despair, of fear… Silver had talked about lies; Llewelyn had asked what had changed. An answer, right or wrong now came to them.
“That…that’s Flynt!” said Madbrook, standing up.
******
Flynt said nothing. His ayes were averted, as if he was trying to hide his grief from the clan, but nothing could hide the redness of his eyes or the dark circles beneath them. Beside him, Kahreen squeezed his hand and looked at the clan.
“You know, don’t you,” she said flatly.
“We had hoped Ed and Shaiya had been mistaken, but-” Vashkoda sighed. ‘It’s true then?”
“Yes,” Kahreen nodded.
And that was all there was to say. No why’s, no bargaining or pleas for hope. Flynt’s cry had rendered the need for any of those unnecessary. It was cruel? Yes. Was it unfair? Most certainly. But it was the stark naked truth. Kahreen was dying and there wasn’t much else the clan could do except to watch her go.
******
The nights passed, although for Flynt and many of the clan, time wasn’t marked in hours or days but by the streaks in Kahreen’s hair. Each attack saw the volume of silver increase. Flynt had told them what the silver represented, and ultimately what would happen when the fiery warmth that had once been her hair was extinguished. And so it was that with dread, after each attack their eyes would be drawn to her hair, to see how much of the shimmering hourglass was left.
If Kahreen was aware of this, she didn’t make any comment. In fact, it seemed that she didn’t allow herself the time to dwell on it. Each moment was filled with her helping some member of the clan. Madbrook was introduced to her ship’s onboard computer and it - perhaps sensing it’s mistress’s wishes - welcomed him.
Chaz was treated to a number of stories about her and Flynt’s adventures in Kithan. The boy listened with a growing delight to the tales of people and creatures he had previously only heard about in fairy tales. This in turn eased Silver’s mind. Her son had been in battles, had even risked his own life on more than one occasion to protect the ones he loved, but death had never been as close or as real as it was now. It was there, and Chaz showed no sign of being afraid.
Chaz wasn’t the only one who was audience to these stories. Many of the clan gathered around to listen, and Ed, after a frantic search for paper and a pen, began to write them down. No one seemed to mind. In fact, it seemed comforting to listen to the faint rustle of paper as Kahreen-and sometimes Flynt-talked.
Not one member of the clan was left out, and through it all was Flynt, ever by her side. The night after they had made the announcement, Flynt had taken Sabrina aside and had asked her if there was any way he could stay awake after sunrise. She knew his reasons for asking, and so it was with great reluctance that she told him that no, she didn’t know of a way to keep him from turning to stone. The brief look of disbelief that he gave her was hard to take. He wanted every moment he could get his hands on, and she couldn’t give them to him.
In the midst all of this, Cesar returned on a night when the world outside the cabin was a solid wall of white. No one gave him more than a glance as he slowly opened the door and slipped inside. It seemed as if none had the heart to do more than acknowledge his presence. It was strange, and as he opened his mouth to ask why, the door to the cabin’s one bedroom opened and the clan’s second in command came through. She caught sight of Cesar and frowned. “We haven’t seen you since the wind ceremony,” Vashkoda said as she closed the door behind her. “Where have you been?”
“Ah’m sorry,” Cesar said, his eyes cast downwards. “Ah should have told you all where I was going, but it didn’t seem to be the right time.” He paused and looked up at Vash. The female was wearing an expression of mild annoyance. “I…well, what I mean is that I-“
“Would you just spit it out already?” Malachi snapped.
“Varges is dead.” Cesar looked up and around at the clan. “He won’t cause any more trouble for the clan.” Their reaction was not the one he’d expected. Some muttered to themselves, while others looked worried. Had the mutate stirred up a hornet’s nest? Vashkoda, seeming to sense this, spoke again.
“So you killed him,” she said. Cesar nodded, then shook his head a moment later when she asked if he had been seen or followed.
“No. Ah made sure no one followed me back here.”
Vash sighed. “Then there’s nothing more we can do about it.” Her voice hardened. “But you shouldn’t have gone Cesar, especially not alone. This clan has enough troubles to deal with already.”
“What happened?” he asked, feeling slightly put out at their lack of appreciation of his efforts to protect them. “Ah thought it would be a good thing, the clan having one less enemy to worry about.”
“Some enemies cannot be stopped with claw and fang, Cesar,” she said as she glanced at the bedroom door. “Some of them we have no defence against.” She proceeded to tell him all that had happened in his absence.
******
The nights continued to tick by. Then came the dreaded moment when Kahreen’s hair was entirely silver. As the hours passed, her strength slipped away from her, and just after sunset her legs gave out. They had offered to carry her into the bedroom. Kahreen had refused, saying that she wanted to have everyone around her, and so they set about making her as comfortable as possible. Flynt became increasingly restless, unable to stay in one spot for very long. Eventually Kahreen sent him outside, telling him to get something from her ship. He had hesitated, unwilling to leave her side for even a moment.
“It’ll be alright,” she assured him. “I’ll still be here when you get back.”
He had paused, afraid that despite her assurances she wouldn’t be there. These moments were rare, precious, and he didn’t want to miss a single one. “Couldn’t one of the others?”
“Please?” she asked, and so, not wanting to waste any more time, he left. As soon as the door closed behind him, Kahreen called the rest of the clan to her. “I want you to do something for me,” she said.
“You only have to name it,” Vash said softly. The rest of the clan nodded.
“I need you to look after him. After I’m gone he-“ she faltered a little, closed her eyes, breathed out and then opened them again. “After I’m gone he’s going to need you all like never before. He’s lost so much. I don’t want him to lose everything.”
Vash smiled and laid her hand on top of Kahreen’s “Never fear. As long as he needs us we’ll be there.”
“And even in the times he doesn’t,” Llewelyn added.
Kahreen smiled, glad that Llewelyn’s upbeat nature hadn’t deserted her. The clan…Flynt would need that in the days to come. “Thank you, all of you,” she said. “I…we were so lucky to come back to a family like this.”
“It was a family you helped form. Of course it has strong foundations,” Sabrina said, glancing up as the door opened and Flynt hurried in. As he approached them, the clan drew back, sensing that this was a private moment. “We won’t be far,” Vash said softly as she and the rest moved away.
Kahreen nodded, and then turned her attention to Flynt as he knelt down beside her.
“I think I found it,” he said, holding something that was barely visible between his hands. “Is this it?” he asked, showing her a small metal box.
“That’s it,” she said. “There’s a small keypad on the side. You’ll need to enter a code to open it. It’s 1-9-7-7.”
“What’s in here?” He asked as he sat down in the chair beside her and worked on the code.
‘It’s an heirloom,” she said. “The only thing I have from my homeworld. It’s something I want you to have.”
The ‘heirloom’ seemed to be nothing more than a thin, flat sheet of crystal. However, as Flynt removed it from it’s box, a small shiver of electricity seemed to run under his fingers. In surprise, he dropped it on the floor.
“Don’t worry, it won’t hurt you.” Kahreen chuckled. “It runs off the natural electricity in your body.”
“What is it?” he asked as he picked it up again.
“A photograph I suppose.” She leant back against the pillows. “Tell me what you see in there.”
Flynt frowned as he gazed at the sheet. “Woodland, I see a woodland and…and three people.” His eyes widened. “One of them is you!”
She smiled. “I think I was about twenty years old when that was taken.”
“You don’t look very happy.”
“No, don’t suppose I was. Not much of a nature lover back then.”
“Who are the other two?”
“My teammates…I guess you could call them my clan,” she said, starting to sound tired.
“Kahreen…” Flynt said worriedly as he started to lower the ‘photograph’.
“I’m ok,” she said and smiled at him. “I guess my body doesn’t like my mouth going so much. Anyway, the other biomech, the one with brown hair and the goofy smile. That’s Tethis.”
“The one we named our son after.” Flynt said. “He looks exactly as you described him.”
“Yes.” She nodded. “The most human out of all of us. He was too good a person to be born into the world as it stood.”
“Who is this?” Flynt asked as he pointed to the third person in the image. The dark-haired individual was half turned away from the camera, looking towards Tethis.
“Him? I told you about him on Kithan. Remember?” She closed her eyes. “I wonder where he is now?” her voice trailed off.
“Where?” Flynt frowned. “But I thought you said he died.”
“Mmn?” she opened her eyes and looked at him. “Had a soul hadn’t he. Could be anywhere.” Her eyes fluttered closed again. “Definitely too much talking,” she muttered.
“You need to rest,” Flynt said, setting the photograph aside.
Kahreen’s eyes opened suddenly. She glanced at the clan, at the cabin and finally at the door. “No more resting. I need to feel the wind and see the stars.”
“My love, it’s well below freezing out there-“
“The temperature won’t make a difference,” she said. “Please?
Flynt froze. ‘Kahreen…”
“I’m tired, Flynt. I just need a bit of fresh air before I go to sleep. That’s all.”
Vash spoke. “It…it is a beautiful night outside. You really shouldn’t be cooped up in here.” The clan had gathered around the pair, drawn by words that didn’t need saying. “We can look after things here for a while. It’s alright.”
As Flynt looked around he saw tears in the eyes of some of the clan. Chaz clung tightly to his mother. They knew, and here they were saying it was all right for this to be something only their leader and his mate would experience. Even if they weren’t there in the flesh, they would be there in thought…
…and with love.
“Thank you,” said Flynt as he gently picked Kahreen up and cradled her in his arms.
“We’ll be here,” Vash said, gently laying her hand on Flynt’s arm. “Kahreen…” she started but found she couldn’t finish
“Just look after them, Vash.” She smiled. “And look after yourself. As for the rest of you-” Kahreen smiled, and they knew it would be the last time they would see that sly, cocksure expression on her face. “If anyone threatens you, give them hell. Because there is nothing stronger than this clan when you stand together as one. I’m proud to have been counted a member of this family.” She closed her eyes, suddenly looking very tired and very vulnerable.
“Thank you,” she said to them as Flynt moved towards the door. The clan said their farewells as the door opened and the cold night air rushed in. For a moment, Flynt hovered on the threshold, unsure of whether or not to take that next and irreversible step. And then, all too quickly they were gone, dark figures amongst the shadows.
The door to the cabin remained open. It would continue to pour light and heat out into the dark night until Flynt returned.
******
“See? The air is much cleaner up here.”
They were sitting near the edge of the cliffs that rose behind the cabin. Before them extended the eastern sky, a brilliant jeweled contrast to the darkness of the earth below. Around them a hard frost was tightening it’s grip on the land.
“Silver says it might snow tomorrow,” Flynt said as he wrapped his arms and his wings around Kahreen and then wrapped a large woolen blanket around them both.
“Chaz will love that,” she said and sighed. “You could get lost up there.”
“Hmn?”
“That sky. It’s beautiful.”
“There are things on earth that outshine it.”
“Flattery will get you everywhere,” she said trying to move closer to him. “Maybe you were right about the cold,” she murmured.
“We could go back.” He suggested.
“No, not just yet.” She frowned. “Do you think they’ll be alright?”
“Who?”
“The clan. They seem a bit…lost, unsure.”
“They’ll be fine,” he said. “They-“
“But I guess they’ll be okay once you whip them back into shape again,” she continued as if she’d not heard him.
“Kahreen…”
“Did they decide where the clan was going to go?”
“No, not yet.”
“Somewhere with mountains ‘d be nice. You’d be close to the stars….” Her voice trailed away.
“Kahreen?”
“I was just thinking. Do you remember the mountains on Kithan? Thorngrim’s place?”
He nodded. “Yes.” Thorngrim’s castle had been the place where Tethys had been born.
“I felt safe there,” she said. “I feel safe here too.” Again she lapsed into silence. When she spoke again her voice was small, more hesitant. “But I’m scared, Flynt. I’m absolutely bloody terrified. Don’t let go…please?”
“I’m here, my love. I will always be here,” he said, slowly stroking her hair.
“I thought…I thought…” she trailed off pausing for a long enough time that Flynt moved her in his arms so that he could see her face. For a moment it was still, no movement, no look of recognition in her eyes and then, slowly as if they were struggling against some barrier, she looked up at him.
“Thought I’d always die in battle or alone and be forgotten,” she said in a voice that was no more than a whisper. “I guess the universe doesn’t hate me as much as I thought it did.”
“It never hated you,” he softly replied. ‘Not even if it had the smallest fraction of the love I feel for you. Remember what we said in our mating ceremony? One, now and forever-”
“-Because love and the spirit are more than the flesh will ever be.” She smiled at him “Thank you.” Her eyelids fluttered closed. “I love you Flynt.”
“I love you Kahreen,” Flynt whispered, his voice clogged with emotion. He now held her close to him and the tears he had been holding back all that night flowed freely. “Always.”
They stayed like this for a long time. In the distance, dark clouds, heavily ladened with snow, began to roll in from the north. It was only when the first of the snowflakes floated lazily down that Flynt moved again, looking down at the still form in his arms.
“Kahreen?”
This time there was no answer. Flynt lowered his head and wept, knowing there would never be another answer.
******
As he began to dig at the blackened, frozen ground with his bare hands, he noticed that silently, one by one, the clan joined him. The digging was almost hypnotic, and as his talons pushed aside the hard earth, he found his mind wandering back to another time…
He rested his mate's head back onto the rocky ground and began searching for loose rocks to cover her body with. He could not risk a funereal pyre, the flames would no doubt attract attention, but neither would he leave her exposed for the invaders or scavengers to discover. He noted with appreciation other clan members following his lead, and a short time later, Nightshade’s cairn was completed.
A different time, a different clan, and yet the similarity of the past to the present was too close, too close. He stopped and let the earth fall from his hands as he sat back on his haunches. He looked behind him, at the still bundle that had once held all his hopes. Once again he was burying his mate, unable to perform the wind ceremony that should have been hers by right.
“You once said you were cursed, Kahreen. You were wrong. I’m the one who’s cursed. I’m protected from injury, from illness, but it would seem that it doesn’t pass me by. It’s reflected off me, onto those I love. I’m sorry. I failed you. I failed both of you.”
“Flynt?”
Flynt looked up. Standing across the open grave from him was Vash, her hands as dirty as any of the others.
“Flynt. It’s time.”
Flynt made no reply. Instead, he turned around and picked up Kahreen. Slowly, gently, he laid her body into the grave. She looked so quiet, so at peace. Beside her he placed the staff she had carried in the days when she’d first met the clan. He couldn’t recall a time she’d ever used it in battle, and yet she’d held onto it, a sentimental relic from her past.
“We buried you once before. Do you remember, Kahreen?” Flynt stood up and took a step back. “You came back to us then. But now? I keep hoping you’ll open your eyes again, but it won’t happen. I know because I can’t feel you any more.”
“Goodbye my love,” he said. “You weren’t born on this world but you chose it to be your home and now your body will become a part of it.” He looked up at the stars. “Now, now your spirit can fly to where it belongs, it can leave the hurt and the pain of this world behind. For all your life you searched for peace and for a short time you gained it. I hope you’ve found that peace now, that you and Tethys have found each other. I know that you’ll wait for me and that we’ll be together again. Even death doesn’t have the power to keep us apart. But until that time, please watch over me, and remember me because I will never forget you.”
He lowered his head and fell silent. Around him all was silent save for the low moaning of the wind as if it too mourned her passing.
